Orophin's Cats
by James8
Summary: Haldir is left to kittysit his brothers pets.


AN: Thanxs to Saikagrl for putting up with the long long time in writing this. It was a gift for her when she went to collage for her masters degree she is now studying for her doctorate. Like I said long long time overdue. She has never let me forget it and kept pestering me to finish it. There I finished it. Congrats Lex.

To all my reviewers I hope you enjoy and I will try to write you all, eventually. We are racing full time right now and I'm not home that much. I opened my email yesterday and saw like 300 messages. I nearly choked. Anyway enjoy the story.

Orophin's Cats

"And don't forget to give Odia her nightly treat-"

"Orophin enough!" Haldir nearly shouted in exasperation. "They are cats for goodness sake, how hard can they be to take care of! By the Valar you are only going to be gone for two days!"

"Haldir!" Orophin whined.

Haldir resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He sobered quickly though seeing the hurt in his younger brother's face. "Do not worry. I will take care of them. They'll be fine. I promise."

Orophin brightened visibly. Celeborn and Rumil came up behind them. "Come on Orophin it is time to go."

"Have a good hunt and be safe." Haldir murmured. He gave both of his younger brothers a hug.

Celeborn gave his shoulder a fatherly squeeze. "We will be back shortly."

Haldir nodded and watched as the elder elf lead his brothers off. Celeborn had decided to take the youngsters on a hunt. It would be Rumil's first. Orophin had pleaded to go to as he adored the elder elf like a father. It was a duty normally reserved for the father but as theirs was killed by orcs years earlier Celeborn had taken on the responsibility. Haldir had fond memories of his first hunt with Celeborn and knew his brothers would have a pleasant and safe time.

Satisfied Haldir turned walking back into the talan. He stopped short finding four pairs of eyes watching him expectantly. He shook his head his silver hair falling about his face. How hard could it be to watch four cats?

Haldir rushed around the kitchen. He had to leave for drill shortly and had yet to feed the cats their breakfast. Orophin normally diced some fish in with their dried meal but considering he would be late figured the cats would survive without it this one time. He had their dishes spread out on the counter their names engraved on each silver dish. Three of the cats were already there. Patch was a black and white short haired cat whose golden eyes crossed. He was verbally berating Haldir for talking his time in dispensing his meal.

Rusty was a tan and black calico short hair with green eyes that had no qualms in batting impatiently at his hands as he tried to dish the food.

Odia was a grey and black tiger short hair with gold eyes, she was more patient sitting quietly at his feet but nearly causing him to trip every other step. Francis, now where was that long haired golden pain anyhow? With a sigh Haldir headed towards the living area nearly tripping again over Odia as he went. He found the large cat stretched out on several cloaks hanging over the railing. Haldir poked him in the side. The cat opened a golden eye.

"Are you coming or what?"

The cat yawned regally stretching out his paws and flexing his claws.

Haldir got the uncomfortable notion the cat was giving him a warning. Didn't Orophin trim those daggers? The cat could have gutted a warg.

The cat gave him a last dismissive look as it hopped down and headed to the kitchen Haldir following. He looked doubly insulted as Haldir set the dish in front of him. The cat's tail thumped the floor in disapproval. Francis turned narrowed yellow eyes up at him.

Haldir rolled his eyes. "I'm sorry it doesn't meet with your approval your highness but I have to go. Eat it or don't."

Just cats, Haldir thought grabbing his cloak before heading out the door. They won't even know the difference. It was until he was halfway towards the barracks that he noticed the golden cat hair covering his cloak.

Yawning, Haldir stepped into the talan grateful that the drills were done for the day. He was looking forward to sitting down with a book and just relaxing. He stepped back though as something crunched under foot. He looked down to find a dried plant crushed under his boot. He picked it up and sniffed experimentally. Catnip. Frowning he saw a trail of the stuff leading to the kitchen. Grimacing he headed towards the kitchen just as something clattered to the floor. He threw the door open and four sets of eyes turned from whatever mischief they were doing to look up at him.

Haldir had never seen such a mess in his life. There was flour everywhere even on the ceiling, and matching floured footprints on every available service. Patch was looking up at him from inside one of the large pots with what looked to be carrot leaves hanging over his left ear. Rusty was in the sink trying to stick a paw down the drain making Haldir wonder what she had batted down there. Odia was hooking bags of dried goods out of the cupboard with a paw and chewing the end open to get at what was inside. Francis was eyeing him steadily from atop the kitchen table his golden eyes narrowed in obvious disdain. Underneath the table lay several gutted fruits with juices running freely and mixing with the flour. Francis yawned at him before stepping daintily over the mess and out the door the other three cats following swiftly behind him.

Haldir groaned letting his head thump against the doorframe.

Exhausted from cleaning the mess up the cats had made previously Haldir slumped onto the settee. He still could not understand how four cats without the use of hands could cause so much mess. He had never seen such a disaster before. He moaned throwing an arm across his eyes. He was just starting to drift off when he felt a prickle of unease spread through him. He removed his arm and looked around him. Nothing. He looked down. Sitting on her haunches and glaring at him balefully was Odia.

"What?" He questioned the cat rather annoyed.

The feline just stared back at him her yellow eyes narrowed into slits.

"I wasn't the one who made the mess in the kitchen you know."

Odia's tail tapped expectantly.

"Go away!" Haldir resumed his previous position determined to ignore the finicky feline. He tried drifting back off but he couldn't. He could sense the cat's eyes on him. He tried to settle more deeply into the seat.

"Meow."

Haldir gritted his teeth.

"Meaow."

Haldir focused on keeping his breathing regular. He was not-

"Oohff." Haldir gave a grunt as the cat tired of being ignored jumped into his lap. He sat up startled to find Odia seated on his lap staring at him expectantly. "Oh for the love of the Valar! I don't want you on my lap!"

The cat tightened her claws warningly letting him know she would not be removed so easily.

Annoyed, but not wanting to be at the business end of those claws, he scooped up the cat and stood up before depositing her on the couch. "There have the seat!"

Odia didn't pay him any mind as she curled up on the settee promptly falling asleep.

Haldir changed into his nightclothes glad that the day was over. Between drills and cats it had been a long day. He crawled under the covers before blowing out the small glow lamp. His eyes fell half mast as he began to fall into elven revere.

He was half aware of feeling something jump up onto the bed. The small form made it's way up before settling heavily on his chest. He was jerked to consciousness a moment later when a cold nose came into contact with his and he found himself nose-to-nose and eye-to-eye with Patch.

Haldir groaned in dismay before pushing the cat of his chest and rolling over in bed pulling the pillow over his head. It proved to be no relief as the cat climbed onto his back licking the back of his exposed neck. The feeling gave him the shivers and he flung a hand out pulling the covers over his head as well. There was a moment of stillness before he felt the cat jump off the bed.

Sleep tugged at him again and he was all too eager to go when a faint tinkling noise echoed in the room. It took Haldir a moment to recognize the noise for what it was. It was one of the tinkle balls that Rumil had made Patch.

The ball made fast chime like noises as it was batted across the room. Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle. Patch ever loudly chased after it before bumping into something as he skidded over the floor. Swish, swish, swish, bam.

Haldir gritted his teeth.

Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle.

Swish, swish, swish, bam.

The cat would grow tired he would not do this all night.

Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle.

Swish, swish, swish, bam.

It was just a cat for Valar's sake.

Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle.

Swish, swish, swish, bam.

The pointy-eared, black and white, cross-eyed son of Morgoth!

Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle.

Swish, swish, swish, bam.

Haldir sat up abruptly glaring at his offender. "Could you be quiet!"

Patch looked up at him startled.

"It's late! I would like to get some sleep if it isn't too much trouble!" Haldir shouted.

The cat seemed taken aback by his sudden outburst as it sat on its haunches watching him inquisitively.

Haldir panted for a moment before settling. Well it was quiet now. He took a deep breath before crawling back under the covers. He shut his eyes relaxing once again into elven revere.

Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle.

Swish, swish, swish, bam.

Giving a happy sigh Haldir gratefully turned off the water for his bath. He was looking forward to relaxing a bit. He was also hoping it would revive him a bit after his sleepless night of dealing with Patch's antics. He sank into the tub eyes closed in bliss. Holding his breath he dunked himself under the water, coming up and wiping the water from his eyes.

He blinked.

He shut his eyes and counted to ten before opening them.

Nope, she was still there.

At the bottom of the tub sat Rusty. Her green eyes took in the proceedings with interest her multihued tail twitching back and forth.

"Can I get no privacy?" Haldir muttered picking up a washcloth.

Rusty chirped.

"Go away," growled Haldir.

Rusty flicked her tail twice more before doing the exact opposite. She trotted towards him on the rim of the tub. Halting she stopped to shake her front paw after stepping in a wet spot; then continued towards him this time to shake a back paw dry.

"Why don't you just leave?" Haldir questioned watching the cat's progress. "You don't like water as it is."

Rusty, not to be deterred, hopped over the next puddle.

"You're going to fa-"

Was all Haldir got out before giving a pained shriek as the dark calico slipped falling into the water.

"We're home!" Rumil shouted entering the talan and nearly tackling his older sibling in his haste to see him. "I got a deer!"

"Well done." Haldir congratulated him.

Celeborn entered behind him. "It was quite a shot too. He can share the story during dinner. Galadriel will want to hear it too." Celeborn's silver eyebrow rose as he looked over the older brother. "Where there difficulties?"

"You have no idea." Haldir muttered. "Those creatures of Morgoth's that Orophin has as pets are menaces. I have scratches in unmentionable places."

Celeborn's face twisted. "I guess now would not be the time to mention-"

"Haldir!" Orophin shouted in excitement. "Look what we picked up in the human's city."

Haldir's eyes widened as he looked at the kittens in his brother's arms.

"I'm naming the black one Quincy and the furry tiger one Winchester." Orophin continued unaware of his elder brother's horror. "Are they not the greatest? Haldir? Haldir? Haldir?"

Celeborn grabbed the older brother as he went limp. "Don't worry aier. It's just too much excitement."


End file.
